Natalie questions Ryan Bingham on his emotionless life philosophy in "Up in the Air."
I thought I would do a thematic approach on career and work-life balance considerations for this month’s 15 Personal Lessons since this month had been dominated by conversations about career: I am in the process of looking for a third rotation, had a tough month a work, watched “Up in the Air,” helped organize the CAAEN Leadership Training kickoff, am helping a relative find a job, and had two friends who just changed jobs. I hope these spark some thoughts about your own career paths and work-life balance.
1. What are you working for? (Or if you make a lot of money, what’s the point of being so baller?). Think about what really matters to you in your life and whether the money you are earning allows you to enjoy those things that matter.
2. Money can’t trump personal dignity. My friend was making good money but decided to change jobs for more time, happiness, and respect at work. This CareerBuilder ad hits it on the spot, albeit with some humorous exaggeration.
3. You always have the opportunity to say no. Be assertive and manage your own career and life to the way you want it to be. Just because you are given an opportunity doesn’t necessarily mean it’s the right one for you.
4. The people who really care about you are the ones who will be real with you. Find these types of people so that you have someone to turn to when life presents you with tough decisions. It’s always enlightening to be able to have someone provide candid feedback on what has honestly been going through your mind.
5. Don’t beat around the bush when it really matters. If you really want something, then let that person know. Dropping hints or making suggestions won’t compel someone to take the action you want them to take. This is especially relevant for people (i.e. many Asian Americans) who grew up being taught to be non-direct or non-confrontational.
6. We are all free agents in the new global economy. The concept of employment-for-life or “铁饭碗” doesn’t exist anymore, so you need to be flexible and manage yourself as your own company. Your loyalty to a company or your connections with your group’s boss can’t immediately save you when your entire group including your boss is being outsourced.
7. Don’t get too comfortable with where you are. I had a friend explain why that was the reason he didn’t even know about all the different opportunities available to him, much less pursue them. Always involve yourself in something new, especially when it’s related to career paths, skills, and networks.
8. Broaden your network. I went to a gala dinner that was well-attended by the San Francisco political and community leaders and realized I didn’t know anyone there besides the person who invited me. These are the moments that tell you to start making inroads into another network or community.
9. Remember that networking means relationship-building. People feel more compelled to help others who they know or like. I recommended Keith Ferrazzi’s book “Never Eat Alone” to multiple friends this month and I highly suggest you go read it if you haven’t already.
10. Backup your resume! When my flash drive died, there were only two documents that I knew I really needed or couldn’t afford the time to recreate, and my resume was one of them.
11. You know you are overworked when you have trouble being spontaneous. I tried being spontaneous instead of planning everything during my trip to LA and it was more difficult than I imagined. Then again, I just have to learn to unplug myself from this overworked, must-be-efficient mentality to be able to appreciate spontaneity.
12. Does your life philosophy sync with your long-term goals? I realized I hold similar life philosophies with Ryan Bingham from “Up in the Air,” but I still have the opportunity to make choices that would lead me to a different path than his emotionless life. Have a clear vision of your long-term goals and future lifestyle so that your current life philosophy does not lead you astray.
13. Setting arbitrary goals may lead to disappointment. In “Up in the Air,” Ryan Bingham hits his goal of 10 million frequent flyer miles, yet the moment wasn’t nearly as exciting as he had thought it would be. Instead of setting arbitrary goals (e.g. high salary, prestigious title, expensive purchase), try imagining the experience or feeling that you want and then execute on an action plan that can get you there.
14. It’s increasingly difficult to find people to spend time with. Specifically, I am having a hard time finding someone to travel with this May/June. I wish more people could prioritize and actively manage their work-life balance rather than let it come to them.
15. Have something to look forward to. I was having a bad month but luckily I had scheduled a trip at the end of the month. That allowed me to break away from routine and refresh. Turn on your own flashlight if you can’t see light at the end of the tunnel.
KFC,
I thought it would be more intimate if I posted here rather than Facebook. Besides, this would be, for the most part, for your eyes only. Secondly, it’s vaguely annoying sometimes to see “you have one new notification” from a post you made weeks ago.
In any case, I hope you’re doing well. I haven’t heard much from you this past month but it seems like you were extremely productive.
To touch upon a few of things you wrote this month, I’m really fond of:
#13. I’ve become increasingly aware that identifying the journey and the path to get there is more fulfilling than any monetary reward can offer. It makes the goals that you set out to accomplish that much more fulfilling. Good insight there.
#12. I think it’s very important to remain true to your ideals and if your life philosophy doesn’t click with that you want to do, there’s likely to be internal clashes in the future. It’s something to keep in mind.
#14. Tell me about it. I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you since you’re all the way in Mountain View and your work schedule is pretty hectic. I barely manage to squeeze a few dinners here and there with 2 south, maybe visit Nancy in Arcadia and occasionally go on an outing with Twin but they require a fair amount of effort on my part.
#11. I have trouble being spontaneous as well. I feel lost if I don’t have a schedule or if I don’t adhere to a certain plan, I’m unlikely to enjoy myself. I think this partly stems from me envisioning what I want to do and how happy I’ll be after I accomplish it. Being spontaneous is hit or miss but I won’t deny that it can be highly refreshing.
Overall, I definitely liked the theme of this month’s lessons. It really rings true to a lot of us who are working towards different careers but essentially walking down the same path. I always enjoy reading these lessons and sorry about the delay in commenting. It has been busy here at research with mouse work twice a week (I was only doing it once a week before). They require a lot of prep beforehand.
Also, I know your bday is around the corner and I’ve been coordinating with 2 South upon your behalf to try to coordinate something with you. For the time being, it’s likely that me, Robyn and Julie will be able to make it out. Nancy works on the weekends, Tom may or may not be busy, Hiroshi may be able to make it and Phong tends to be MIA. Let us know what you want to do though I recall you saying you wanted to make a trip to SB. My Twin can probably make it as well. You’re welcome to invite any friends who are still in this area; it doesn’t have to be a 2 South exclusive event. It’s your birthday! We’ll talk more about it as the date approaches. Let me know. Hope you’re taking care of yourself. Hope you’re still going to the gym.
- Your neighborhood photographer
P.S. I just booked my first engagement shoot next weekend. I’m extremely nervous but this may be the first step towards the grand premiere of David Chu Photography. I’ll keep you posted!
Wow!! This is awesome!
Thanks Danna!